2015-08-01 11:56 pm

(no subject)

i haven't really been into the OC scene but this story sort of formed itself in my head tonight. heavily inspired by a This American Life episode called "Abdi and the Golden Ticket," which aired July 4, 2015.

maybe a plot for the next fire emblem game. or maybe it's too close to IF (i have no idea and won't until at least 2016) so it's a plot for some kind of cool fantasy jrpg.

Protag: my first thought is a guy, because jrpg protags are always guys, but I don't see why I can't break with tradition here. people Should break with tradition. So protag could be a female. I guess essentially it doesn't matter; player can choose either but default is female because Let's shake up the system a little (/suck it, boys). A refugee in a war-torn country, trained in battle (she was conscripted I guess), trying to get to a better place. She gets there, and tries to build a rebel force to fight the enemies back home. But finds that the conflict isn't so black-and-white; her enemies have their own reasons (kare nari no riyuu ga aru to omounda)--maybe diplomacy is the answer here? Only to find that the better place people need the wars to continue...! (that last sentence is a plot twist so dont tell anyone ok)

World: There's protag's war-torn home country, and lots of warring states around it. Yeah, a fire emblem map comes to mind. There's also this shining golden land with an advanced civilization... like how elves in LOTR are or those dragon people in Xenoblade (manaketes? is it just like FE??). It's a peaceful land of prosperity and opportunity, and of course the rest of the world would love to go there but of course it's super hard to get in unless you're one of those higher being people who live there. Currently picturing men with long silver or blonde hair because i'm anime trash
Anyway, in an effort to diversify their society, connect with the rest of the world without getting too dirty with its bloody wars and political unrest and stuff, and provide opportunity to a few lucky individuals, this golden land holds a lottery each year that allows one person from each outside country to get in. (Just like the visa lottery that the US holds which the TAL episode introduced me to.) 

Life used to be good for protag--happy childhood memories of family and peace. Then war breaks out, and everything changes. Suddenly every day is a struggle to survive. She learns to fight. The reason for the war, as far as it is known to her people, is your typical (dumb) reason for war: the enemy wants some kind of valuable resource that our country has; we need it and can't afford to share it; enemy Really wants it so they invade and attack our civilian populations as a show of ruthless force to intimidate our leadership into giving up the resource (it's idk the dragonballs, or the fire emblem, or triforce you get what i mean).

[gameplay: Begins with protag in soldier training. basic gameplay tutorial, can only run around hometown, practice sparring with fellow soldiers--this is so cliche LOL UGH but that's how it goes. Then flashback cutscene fills you in on her backstory and the reason for the current war.)

Thrown into such a miserable situation, protag applies for the lottery. Chances are slim, but what the heck? Guess what, she wins!! ding ding ding
Sometime between winning her ticket and her immigration date, the battlefield reaches her neighborhood and despite her efforts to defend them, most of her family is wiped out. Now it's a revenge story: she resolves to get to the golden land and find the means to fight back against her home country's aggressors. She meets other lottery winners who have also been victims of her enemy's violence. A few join her cause (dwarf/melee guy joins your party! plucky thief joins your party! etc). In the golden land, she finds access to superior arms and weapons and learns new attack skills! (it's that part of the game where up until now you've only had the basic tunic and kokiri sword or whatever, but now you got the master sword! nice!) Despite being a peaceful civilization, the golden land people seem sympathetic to her cause; they tell her they disapprove of her enemy's aggression and help her strengthen her little rebel force, provide some resources, etc. 

[gameplay: control protag/mission is to go apply for the lottery. do it and there's a cutscene. run around and complete a few more basic goals, then cutscene shows lottery results and protag winning. next cutscene is the battle. control returns to player, and you fight a little until you reach the place where your family is going to be killed in such a cliche war story turn of events--cutscene of them dying, protag yells "NO" or something like eren when his mother gets eaten. control returns to player but you dont really do much, it just interrupts a string of cutscenes. then cutscene of some character interaction showing protag resolving to get revenge. next cutscene is travel. Control returns to player, you fight some enemies on your way to your voyage vessel (a ship??). then non-fighting control aboard ship where you have some cute sidequests and character interactions. when you reach the golden land, it's mostly a grinding area with an arena probably, lots of sidequests, your general big main area like kakariko village/luminose city.]

After awhile, she's built up her force and ready to go back and fight. by then the devastation has probably gotten really bad back home. the battle immediately after leaving golden land is probably that Really Tough chapter that you have to attempt a few times. This part of the plot is a little hazy to me; I guess she goes to fight, it's tough and she doesn't make much progress, then finds out some stuff about the enemy? That the conflict is a little more complicated than she thought. Meets someone from her country's royal family; learns that your government did some shitty things too which kind of instigated the enemy's declaration of war. Her discoveries also suggest that diplomacy could be a solution......!

Protag returns to golden land (she has in & out privileges now) for some resource/aid that could help with the diplomacy goal. gets some of that aid, and returns to attempt to implement the solution. But in the middle of it she find a member of the higher race (someone she now knows) sabotaging the peace effort?! 

The explanation for this is where things get a little meta. Turns out the high race people are using the warring states in some kind of game...a video game...? And what's necessary for this genre of game is war! So i'm sorry, you can't just solve things peacefully. Humans wage wars (arasoiau no wa shikatanai no kamoshirenai / maybe war is something that is natural for us), and you guys are damn good at it, so don't stop! Now the ultimate goal is not eradication of one's enemy in war, but destroying the game that we are all pawns in. She takes her fight back to the golden land, where I guess the final boss stages are.

TL;DR IN SUMMARY: protag living in a war-torn country wins a golden ticket out of there to a peaceful land with an advanced civilization. her family is killed right before she leaves, so she resolves to gather the means to fight back when she's in the golden land. builds up her rebel force, gets access to some advanced battle technology, and goes back to fight; finds out that the conflict is not so black and white and that the enemy has their own justifiable reasons. Now tries to end the war through diplomacy and peaceful negotiation between the two sides, but people from the advanced civilization sabotage those efforts just when they seem on the verge of success. Protag learns that the advanced civilization is using the warring states as units in a game, and require that the bloodshed continue. Now the protag & her allies fight to dismantle the game.
2013-08-08 12:10 am


1) needing someone to look up to. where have all my heroes gone?
2) learning how to be alone // aloneness: running from it, hating it, loving it, dealing with it.
3) losing the path? finding it again.
4) twentysomething anxiety
5) relationships not understanding relationships at all
2013-04-29 03:55 am

(no subject)

All my GS4 love: soo, 2-option otome game starring Ema Skye. Since I can't decide whether I ship Ema/Apollo or Ema/Klavier or both, we'll have the two fight over her love in a 2-route tumblr visual novel (like the pokemon dating sim). 

disclaimer i didnt finish gs5 because it sucked so idk is any of this non canon now or

Scenario: Ema's decided to finally take a second shot at that Forensic Investigator exam. With a few years' experience of grade-A detective work under her belt, she's worked her way up--she just needs that certification.

[light ver. / practice run will just have that plot and stay simple. for a fuller version, add in a trial]
She's got the O.K. to ease up on her casework for awhile to study, but then--a murder!! or some case that Ema feels obligated to work on. And of course, Apollo and Klavier will be facing off in court over it.

4 paths: pursue apollo / pursue klavier / pursue both / pursue neither (platonic threesome)
7 outcomes: apollo fail/success, klavier fail/success, both fail/success, neither just...happens

Apollo: informed by the few ema/apollo fics i've read, I agree that he's sort of bashful and shy but earnest. and utterly adorable. I don't think he's that bashful, though--I see him as generally an extrovert and willing to go out on a limb for her.

Klavier: still exploring this one, so I'll have to develop it more. love/hate thing of course. Ema: he annoys the shit out of me but deep down I care about him; Klavier: i'm a total player, all the ladies love me, whatever--except that one. and of course that's the one he finds himself drawn to, but for reasons based on her personality rather than sheer unattainability. just making that clear. 

If you choose to pursue one over the other, the two won't compete with each other. The story focuses on your relationship with your chosen character only. The "both" arc, however, involves them competing with each other for your affections.. it's a delicate balancing act considering your current friendship with both; success = idk, polyamory? failure = you try to play both of them and end up with none.  The "neither" path means you prioritize the test/case for almost all decision points, and ends with the three of you just staying friends. It sounds boring, but I see it ending in a cute OT3 kind of way.
2013-04-23 09:32 pm

i feel like doing another music meme

Answer with song titles from one artist.

Pick a band/artist: GREEN DAY (obviously)

1. Are you male or female?

2. Describe yourself:
She's a Rebel / Jaded / Scattered / Uptight / Burnout / Basket Case / Outsider / The Grouch

3. How do you feel about yourself?
Sick of Me / Are We The Waiting

4. Describe your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend:
No One Knows

5. Describe your current boy/girl situation:
Don't Wanna Fall In Love

6. Describe your current location:
Welcome To Paradise / Strangeland / Murder City

7. Describe where you want to be:
2,000 Light Years Away

8. Your best friend is:
Stuck With Me

9. Your favorite color is:
Angel Blue

10. You know that:
Nice Guys Finish last

11. What’s the weather like:

12. If your life was a television show what would it be called?
I Want to Be on TV / Horseshoes and Handgrenades

13. What is life to you?
Redundant / Misery / Having a Blast

14. What is the best advice you have to give?
Carpe Diem / Stop When The Red Lights Flash / Hold On / Know Your Enemy

15. If you could change your name what would you change it to?
Haushinka / Whatsername / St. Jimmy
2013-04-23 08:12 pm

most of these are Green Day songs

  • 1: A song you like with a color in the title
  • Dark Blue [Jack's Mannequin]
  • 2: A song you like with a number in the title
  • 99 Revolutions [Green Day]
  • 3: A song that reminds you of summertime
  • Boys of Summer [cover by The Ataris]
  • 4: A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about
  • So You Know It Completely [Big Phony and The Sweet Hurt]
  • 5: A song that needs to be played LOUD
  • Jesus of Suburbia [Green Day]
  • 6: A song that makes you want to dance
  • Stray Heart [Green Day]
  • 7: A song to drive to
  • Driver's High [Larc~en~ciel]
  • 8: A song about drugs or alcohol
  • Restless Heart Syndrom [Green Day]
  • 9: A song that makes you happy
  • When Can I See You Again? [Owl City]
  • 10: A song that makes you sad
  • Any Other World [Mika]
  • 11: A song that you never get tired of
  • When I Come Around [Green Day] 
  • 12: A song from your preteen years
  • Upside Down [A*Teens]
  • 13: One of your favorite 80’s songs
  • Rock Me Amadeus [Falco]
  • 14: A song that you would love played at your wedding
  • This Feeling [OA - Gyakuten Saiban victory theme remix]
  • 15: A song that is a cover by another artist
  • Like A Rolling Stone [Green Day cover of Bob Dylan]
  • 16: One of your favorite classical songs
  • Canon in D [Pachelbel]
  • 17: A song that would sing a duet with on karaoke
  • The Love Bug [M-Flo loves BoA]
  • 18: A song from the year that you were born
  • Smells Like Teen Spirit [Nirvana]
  • 19: A song that makes you think about life
  • You Get What You Give [The New Radicals]
  • 20: A song that has many meanings to you
  • Velonica [Aqua Timez]
  • 21: A favorite song with a person’s name in the title
  • ¡Viva La Gloria! [Green Day]
  • 22: A song that moves you forward
  • Kill Your Heroes [AWOLNATION]
  • 23: A song that you think everybody should listen to
  • Franco Un-American [NOFX]
  • 24: A song by a band you wish were still together
  • Supernatural Superserious [R.E.M.]
  • 25: A song by an artist no longer living
  • Changes [2pac]
  • 26: A song that makes you want to fall in love
  • in bloom [School Food Punishment]
  • 27: A song that breaks your heart
  • Make It Stop (September's Children) [Rise Against]
  • 28: A song by an artist with a voice that you love
  • Missing You [Green Day] ~Billie Joe's voice in this song is just...just something else
  • 29: A song that you remember from your childhood
  • Pokemon Theme Song [Jason Paige]
  • 30: A song that reminds you of yourself
  • Last of the American Girls [Green Day]

Stole from Tumblr. I'll answer for myself this time... maybe for a character later

2013-04-17 08:45 pm

Interview: Ema Skye character relationships


Medium "talking head" shot of EMA SKYE. She addresses someone just to the left of the camera.

Oh, Apollo? Haha, that kid just can't catch a break. Always fighting an uphill battle...just like someone else I know.
I do what I can to help him out. I mean, I've been in his shoes before.

She pauses, reminiscing.

Yeah... It's not like any if us have ended up quite where we thought we would.


Ema is...well, I wouldn't say she's a grouch. Not ALL of the time. You just always see her when she's having a bad day.
Which is kind of often, actually.
But still, I guess I'm pretty lucky to have a friendly face on the prosecution's side. Ema knows what she's doing. Aside from the mad-scientist stuff.



Hmph, the glimmerous fop. What is there to say? I can't even count how many times he's made my life difficult.

Oh what, the rock star thing? Yeah, so what? He can save his premadonna stuff for the stage. He's got no excuse for being a total diva at work.


Ah yes, the fräulein scientist. Whereas any other lady will gaze at me with star-struck awe, in her eyes I see only ice.
But it's just as well. My investigative team should be focused and professional, and in Fräulein Skye I know I can expect nothing less.


INTERVIEWER (Off-screen)
Don't you feel kind of privileged, though? Knowing the real Klavier Gavin. Dealing with him up-close and personal.

Like I said, the famous rock star thing never really mattered to me. My friends are always so jealous that I get to work with him, but I tell them how much of a pain he actually is.
...Though I guess you could say I do know him well. Whenever he's got something serious to whine about--which is more than occasionally, let me tell you--he turns to me. Klavier works harder than anyone I know in order to mange that double life, and somehow he pulls both off well.


Trucy's adorable. I'm pretty sure she's not Mr. Wright's REAL daughter... How? Because Mr. Wright is obviously-- (Stops, catches herself)
--Because I just know.

Ema reminds me of one of those investigators on my favorite crime drama. I can just see it: she strides in on the crime scene, her pink glasses glinting in the noonday sun.. They brief her on the victim, and she takes off her sunglasses, dropping a suave one-liner. "YEEEEAAAAHHHH!" --cut to opening sequence.


Um, I think Trucy thinks I'm Horatio Cane.


I used to think she was some kind of crazy science nerd, but nowadays she helps me with my homework! There's no way I could have survived AP Chemistry without her. Though sometimes I have to remind her that I'm the one who needs to do the assignment...
2013-04-17 01:00 am

some GS4 headcanon

Apollo actually has a decent singing voice. When his Chords of Steel are combined with Klavier's rock and roll pipes, they are a force to be reckoned with at karaoke. Which they do often. [on my fanart to-do list]

crack!headcanon: KLAVIER GAVIN FEAT. APOLLO JUSTICE - GUILTY LOVE the collaboration album

Ema, Apollo, and Klavier have quickly become my new OT3. there's some serious broT3 love, of course, but I'm starting to crave a love triangle fic. Ema's milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.

Apollo is kind of a hipster. That's why he hasn't heard of the Gavinners. They're too mainstream.

Ema is a card-carrying member of the Doctor Who fandom. Apollo was into it as a kid (this is canon!), and when Ema found out, she dragged him back.
2013-04-09 03:39 pm

gyakuten saiban m/f meme

I reiterate: I ship everyone with everyone.

1: Phoenix Wright
2: Dick Gumshoe
3: Klavier Gavin
4: Miles Edgeworth
5: Apollo Justice

6: Maya Fey
7: Ema Skye
8: Franziska Von Karma
9: Mia Fey
10: Trucy Wright

male/female meme - answered script-style )
2013-04-07 07:04 pm

Gyakuten Saiban memespammage


List 10 characters
1. Phoenix Wright
2. Miles Edgeworth
3. Maya Fey
4. Apollo Justice
5. Ema Skye
6. Klavier Gavin
7. Franziska von Karma
8. Mia Fey
9. Dick Gumshoe
10. Larry Butz

so things get pretty crack-y up in here )

fandom: Ace Attorney/Gyakuten Saiban

the obligatory fandom meme so I can obsess over GS properly )

Favorite character: Miles Edgeworth
a.k.a. Reiji Mitsurugi, Mitsurugi-kenji, Edgey, Mitsu-chan, Edgey-poo )
2013-02-26 03:05 pm

Character history meme

1. Choose one of your OC's
2. Answer each question truthfully
3. Tag 3 or more people after completing this tag

2013-02-17 01:13 am

another meme dump because procrastination.

Choose 5 fandoms in random order.

1. Legend of Zelda
2. Ace Attorney
3. Elementary
4. Sherlock (BBC)
5. Kingdom Hearts

Fandom Meme )


Shipping Meme
1. Platonic!Joanlock (Elementary)
2. Sherliarty (Sherlock BBC)
3. Hilson (House M.D.)
4. Shulk/Melia (Xenoblade Chronicles)
5. US/Nihon (Axis Powers Hetalia)
6. Ike/Soren (Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance)
7. ZeLink (Legend of Zelda -- kind of. Only because I'm getting bored and I'm between games.)
8. ...
9. nope I go down with my ships
10. MaLink (Legend of Zelda; it is so ugh)
11. Irenelock (Sherlock BBC)
12. Cloud/Aerith (FFVII)
13. Riku/Kairi (Kingdom Hearts)
14. Lockbell (Elementary)

Shipping meme questions )
h'okay enough shipping for today bye
2013-02-12 01:50 am

(no subject)

She stares at me. Raises an eyebrow. She remains still save for that tiny motion of her face, a minor change of expression--it's enough to make me cold. The boredom, the utter indifference. If she'd stared into the abyss itself, she would stand there, just as empty, and raise that eyebrow. Facing down death and nothingness, she would look at it as if to say, "That's it?"

"You mean, there's nothing to live for." I'm trying my best to piece together these excruciating contradictions.

"Well," she shifts in her seat in a sort of shrugging motion, "that's arguable." 

"Then make your argument."

She lets out a great sigh, as if explaining something for the twentieth time. "There is, you see, two kinds of purpose. Positive purpose, and negative."


"To choose to die would be to submit. To give in to the utter injustice of this meaningless existence, in which our only purpose is to seek meaning. I live on--or do my best, anyway--because I'm not going to accept that shit. The simple act of living is a big 'fuck you' to this disgusting universe."

A perfectly sound argument indeed. But there's definitely more to it than that.

I grin knowingly. Leaning back in my seat, I grab the remote and click on the television. Our favorite fictional character is leaning over a table, facing down an adversary--the scene mirrors us. He speaks those unforgettable words:

"Bitterness is a paralytic. Love is a much more vicious motivator."

I click it off. That's all we needed. She looks at me, genuinely confused for a moment. "You know... there's no more love for me."

"Oh, it's not love." My eyes narrow as my grin turns absolutely sinister. "Though, it'd certainly be kinder if it were. No...I have an amendment to our favorite deductionist's words: Hope is a much, much more vicious motivator."
2013-01-27 03:09 am

sherlock, etc. memebarf

fandom: Sherlock BBC

this not-so-high-functioning fangirl )

fandom: Elementary

all my elementary feels )

fandom: Xenoblade Chronicles

it's reyn time )

Character: SHERLOCK FUCKIN HOLMES bbc version

favorite character meme )

Character: Sherlock Holmes CBS AMURRICAN VERSION

favorite character meme for puppy!sherlock )
2012-12-21 01:10 am

(no subject)

 You can't help but feel a pang of--something, as you push that dollar into the little red tin. The lady in the Santa hat pauses her bell-ringing for just a moment to thank you and wish you "Merry Christmas," and you smile and nod but you can't meet her eye. You swiftly turn and walk away, back to your own business, feeling an unpleasant mix of pride and shame, like two clashing flavors on your tongue. You had almost hesitated, as you gave that small amount; somehow you had been trained to feel like an idiot for the most minimal acts of generosity. Only an idiot opens up their wallet, falls for that "do-gooding" scam. 

Now, this couldn't be less relevant to what you believe. Yet somehow, you feel conditioned to act that way.
2012-05-09 12:45 am

my kind of fairy tale.

my kind of fairy tale.

Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away...well, a queendom, actually--there lived a princess--who would soon become queen, that is. Anyway, this princess, though young, ruled over her country as fairly and justly as she could. She loved her people, and for that they thrived. But she had a secret. It was a curse, passed down from her mother, and her mother's mother, and so on as far back as her family could remember. It was a terrible one. For though the women of her family would enjoy the blessings of wisdom, intelligence, and the abilities to leader their country well, they could never fall in love with a man. To do so would kill him the moment she opened her heart to him. And a murderer, as intelligent and fair as she may be, could never keep her crown.

And so, each princess, when she comes to power, is given a charm: a magic lock, worn on a chain over her heart. She wears it to keep her heart locked away, with the hope that it never be unlocked.


[I wrote something like this story...somewhere. It's in a notebook somewhere, but not as a fairy tale. Anyway, this is meant to be an allegory for a dilemma women face, rather than another patriarchy-perpetuating Prince Charming story.

Princess Sanae (just a working name, I don't think she'll end up japanese haha) grows up with this curse and this family history. Throughout the princess's childhood, the castle keeps boys her age away from her. She is not to develop any sort of friendship with one, though she may come in brief contact with them when visiting her people. (Acquaintances are fine, because who believes in love at first sight anyway?) True, the queens must procreate to continue the family line, so they agree to diplomatic marriages of convenience as long as there is no love involved. It happens at a certain age when they understand the concept of "I like you a lot, but I don't think I'm in love with you."

Because this is a fairy tale, the family has uncannily been able to keep the curse under wraps. Maybe a bunch of them were lesbians. But a shady figure within the governing body seeks to uncover the nature of the curse and expose it to the queendom. Things go south when Sanae is about 12, and develops an unrequited love for a boy against her better judgement. Tweens, you know how it is. It's someone she can't avoid, like a politician's son maybe. Anyway, her love ends up killing him, the bad guy figures out the curse and exposes it, and she is exiled from the land. It's not fair because she is then given the lock, removing the threat, and the bad guy misrepresents the curse to make the royal women seem like man-eating she-devils. (Insert moment of man-hating extremist feminism here) ...Bad guy takes power and bam, we have a kingdom. sigh. he does a shitty job, let me tell you.

Years later, she is a peasant girl living in some far-off land. She is known as the girl with the iron heart, and she still wears the padlock charm. She is still an intelligent woman with a strong sense of justice, but she seems very cold and distant to other people. One day, a young man she knows finds out about her origins, and the kingdom she is exiled from. He wants to help her, etc: restore her to power, and return her country to the prosperous state it once was. She's not for it, because she's terribly guilty about killing that boy she once loved, and doesn't want anything terrible happening again. But he convinces her by describing the terrible oppression her people are suffering. So she reluctantly agrees, and they get to work on that... But of course, he manages to "melt the ice queen" (tvtropes whutwhuut) and they start to fall in love. oh noo! 

It comes down to a sappy thing like, she desperately wants to love him but obviously, the curse. It would kill him. She has to keep the lock in place. He loves her, and wants to open her heart so that she can finally know what her foremothers have never been able to know: true love. blah blahh---and if he has to die for it, so be it! He would give his life so that he can free her heart. 

and he does that, and bam! somehow that manages to break the curse. let's say he's a keyblade master or something. I have to figure this part out more. (ZeldaxKingdomHearts crossover? crack.)


Soo yeah, that's the gist of it.. As a feminist read, it tries to avoid Prince Charming cliches and the whole "princess has to be saved," etc. so if the guy helps break the curse, it has to be in a way that isn't an "I'm rescuing you!" sort of thing. I think they manage to break it together.

suck it, Disney.
[now excuse me as I go play Kingdom Hearts.]
2012-04-04 01:35 am

(no subject)

Sometimes one is pushed to desperate means.

And...it wasn't all bad; this wasn't exactly rock-bottom or absolute desperation. It just wasn't the situation she would have expected to find herself in a few months ago. But things had changed since then.

[beginnings of a drabble inspired by the business concept of gamecrush.com]
2012-03-06 02:19 am

(no subject)

 Another Battlefield

Let's say the character is Minoru, because I haven't placed him anywhere definitive yet.

He keeps waking up in different situations, some in his real-world life and others in the game he plays. When the reader joins him, they expect him to be just as confused and disoriented as they are. But to their surprise, he's skilled and knows how to work the situation with barely any context or understanding of how he got there. Experience made him that way.

Sometimes the situations are from his job or his personal life, both of which are a mess. It's hard to tell at first because they are only glimpses. The online/game situations are usually mid-battle, hence the title "Another Battlefield." He slips into the situation much more naturally and fluidly than the real-world ones. And enthusiastically--he tends to approach many offline situations with detachment, sometimes cold indifference.

As the story progresses, the splintered pieces of his lives (online and off) begin to form some kind of picture. But as the fragments of experience accumulate, the distinction between them blur. This loss of ability to recognize fantasy/virtual from reality doesn't surprise him too much. He knew it was coming.

How did he get this way?
"You've lost interest in this world, haven't you?" For someone to let themselves slip into an immaterial world, they must be broken in some way. Something about the world they live in is not right. It doesn't offer something they need. And that other world, as "unreal" as it may be, provides that missing element. They find what they need in a world separate from reality, and slip deeper and deeper into the dream...

I haven't determined what made Minoru the way he is, but it's definitely some dark experience. Something jarring enough to cause this mental illness of sorts, too. 

Other characters/relationships:
Offline, there is a concerned and strong-willed girl who senses something wrong and hopes to save him from it. Ambiguous relationship--okay, just 'cause there's a girl doesn't mean she's in love with him or whatever. Gender-socialized cliche, much. She doesn't express any romantic feelings but does care a great deal. Wake up, Minoru. This world still needs you here.

Online, there's a devoted battle partner. He doesn't gush sensitivity but he definitely cares about Minoru. Ambiguous relationship in the sense that there's lots of bromance/ho-yay potential (actually...why don't we just make this a BL story?). Think...IkexSoren. Anyway, he is the biggest reminder of what Minoru's contribution and importance to the game world is. But he (painfully) knows that Minoru has another life to take care of as well. Is it more important? Equally? He is an NPC...or so we think? Maybe at the end it's revealed that he's another player and they could possibly meet in the real world. If we're going the BL route.

Themes: Okay, How Images Think must be getting to me or something, because this seems to be tackling conventional and new understandings of the real and the virtual. Is Minoru more accountable to his offline world because it's "reality," and the online is not? Is there a legitimate guilt in submitting to fantasy? To a dream? 
2012-03-05 02:28 am

(no subject)


It's dark.


I open my eyes and blink until the scene comes into focus. A boardroom, full of important-looking people. Business suits. Glass walls; views overlooking the city. A dozen humorless gazes...directed at me.

"Mr. Honda. Is my proposition causing you some...difficulty?" Across the table and a seat to the right; a look of balanced disinterest under a creased brow and fringes grey with experience.

I swallow, but I'm not grasping for a script. This one is an easy read.

"Excuse me, Mr. Tajima,"--I venture the name as it is conveniently written on the nameplate before him--"I was lost in thought for a moment. Would you mind rephrasing it so I am sure I understand you correctly?"

"Ah yes, we must be sure we are on the same page! I simply mean that =================================

basically: a consciousness that fades in and out of situations and worlds; you are continuously waking up and finding yourself in either the fantasy or the real. You've grown skilled enough to find your bearings and act appropriately whenever this happens, but little by little you are losing your ability to recognize which world is which.